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Tips & Tricks for a Healthy Love Relationship

Anastasios D. Kalantzis, Surgeon Urologist-Andrologist

 

All of us, men and women, want to love and be loved. We want to experience a healthy relationship, either with a “happy” or a “not-so-happy” ending.

 

In the preface of his book “Thoughts on the necessity of love”, Nikos Dimou writes: “This book is a new series of thoughts. It starts from basic human questions to end up again to communication – because love is nothing else than a top form of communication”.

 

Good Communication = Good Relationship

- The first impression and the correct place and timing are the determining factors for a relationship.

- Our expectations and the quest for the “ideal and perfect” partner should be based on reality and not on the sphere of imagination and the role models imposed to us by the Media on an everyday basis.

- We should know who we are, love ourselves and know what we want, look for and pursuit. We should first accept and love the person we are, our appearance and inner self and reality. Insecure people with low self-esteem as well as those with a huge ego and narcissists end up, in the best of chances, with problematic relationships.

- We should be authentic, real, sincere, open, reasonable and flexible. Without half truths and insinuations that will wear out our partner, and will drive them away from us and our relationship.

- The trust between partners and the freedom they feel inside the relationship are the key factors for its maintenance. Suspiciousness, jealousy, aggressiveness, nagging and insecurity are elements that will have, and very soon indeed, the opposite result from what we really want.

- We should be able to listen and understand the wants, needs, thoughts, preferences and values of our partner, in order to fully understand what they want from us and our relationship.

- It is a good thing that, within the relationship, there is an atmosphere of closeness, mutuality and equality. Without roles and social stereotypes. Without interferences from third parties (friends, families etc.).

- Do not make the mistake to take your relationship or your partner for granted.

- Taking care of ourselves, paying extra attention to our appearance (being clean, well-groomed etc.0 is necessary in order to maintain our partner’s interest in us.

- In sex, it is a good thing to openly express what we want, what are needs, wishes and fantasies are, without any taboos or prejudices.

 

It should be also great to create a good and secure relationship without confusing love with identification.

 

All we have to do is make security a little dangerous, the familiar a little mysterious and the permanent and ordinary a little fresh and original.